Tuesday, April 5, 2011


White Swan & I just finished the first ballet class of our adult lives. It was horrifying. Not the class itself or the teacher. Both were good but I was pretty horrible. Being in a leotard again at my age was also horrifying. I have a feeling the pain tomorrow will be horrific, as well. The teacher actually told me & White Swan to take long hot baths when we got home. I didn't hear her tell the other students to take a long hot bath but their mommies probably still bathe them.

I thought I signed us up for Adult Beginner Ballet Theory. It was actually just Ballet Theory. Not specifically for adults or for beginners. While we weren't the oldest in the class, I could have given birth to the youngest. And not even as a slutty teenager. I could have given birth to the youngest student in the class a few years out of college.

Next week I need to remember to have a snack an hour or so before class. When the teacher told us to fondu I was half way out the door to buy some cheese before I realized I was just supposed to bend my standing leg. I would have preferred the cheese. Maybe next week I will have a V-8. With a shot of vodka. That should make it all a bit easier to take.

-Black Swan


Literally "to melt". Abbreviation for a battement fondu. A term used to describe a lowering of the body which is made by bending the knee of the supporting leg. Saint-Leon wrote, "Fondu is on one leg what a plie is on two." (Wikipedia Glossary of Ballet)


  1. Well, I agree with Black Swan - horrifying just about sums it up. I was barely able to hold it together without bursting into laughter throughout the whole class. That's how ridiculous I felt. BUT....for some reason, this only served to fortify my motivation. When we had this crazy idea to take ballet class a few months ago, I was really gung ho about the whole thing. Then, as the class started looming closer, my excitement gave way to nerves. But now I'm just motivated to get better. As difficult as this first class was, it was still fun (and funny). Look out ballet world, the swans are coming!!

  2. Love your first post, keep em' coming :)

  3. A new adult beginner ballet blog--COOL! I think there are a lot of us out there. Hopefully this will lead to more classes offered exclusively to us. :)

  4. Hurrah! More adult beginners! For my first class last month it wasn't younger students but a clique of "ballet moms" who knew the teacher and the studio and were loud and joking around while I was nervous and feeling very alone. Vodka definitely would have helped!

  5. Hey Swans!
    Semantics here: did you take any ballet when you were children? Just trying to figure out where to put you in my blogroll. I mean, if that's cool with you.

  6. Hey, AB - we have a bio blog in the works, but we both took ballet for about 5 minutes as youngsters. But if you have a "haven't got a clue" category, you can put us there

  7. And yeah it's cool if you add us to your blog roll! I totally dorked out today when White Swan told me you commented on our blog. We started following you when we first started looking into taking classes. I even tried to get White Swan to try Smirnoff's vodka & pepper cure a few weeks ago but it was a no go.